Living abroad has a funny effect on relationships. Couples seem to either grow significantly closer or disintegrate under the pressure of a new country, culture, home, and job (or lack of one in the case of many spouses.) There are few reliable statistics on the issue, ex-pats are by nature hard to keep track of. But expatresearch.com claims a whopping 70% of “failed relocations” site family issues as the cause.
Depression, infidelity, and social isolation are the leading causes of these issues according to relationship expert Adele Theron in a 2018 CityLife article.
The good news is it’s not a coin toss. You have control over whether your overseas adventure helps build and strengthen your relationship or ends it. Common wisdom says to focus on open communication, problem-solving, and asking for and sharing needs. But that can be difficult at the best of times and with the stress of a new life in a strange country and the additional isolating effects of Covid-19 many couples seek out professional counseling. Here are a few resources available in Beijing and online. As always you should do your own due diligence in selecting a medical professional.
Joanne Harris Adult & Child Counsellor. Provides online counseling in English for people 15 and older. Available weekday evenings. Areas of experience are anxiety, depression, stress, loss, transition & family/relationship dynamics. Contact info WeChat: wxid_5tdgv12mkip312 Email: lifechangescounselling@protonmail.com
Dr. Mike Merhvarz Psychologist, English, Farsi, Mandarin; individual, couple & marriage therapy; ADHD, ADD, Dyslexia, Asperger, Autism, pediatric developmental assessment, psychological and neuropsychological testing. International Medical Center, Beijing. For more information email dr.mike@imcclinics.com
Danielle Harris. Dongcheng, evenings and Saturdays. Online Child and adult psychotherapist. Works with people 14 and older. Among others anxiety, addiction, depression, trauma, transition, stress loss. WeChat: dani-1926.
Ms. Masooma Kachelo, MS MFT, Certified Mindfulness Teacher, English. Works weekdays in the Shunyi/Chaoyang area. 15 years of experience. Uses mindfulness-based approaches for working with those suffering from depression, anxiety, and trauma-related relational challenges. WeChat: mindfulturn-mas
Dr. Michelle Mope Andersson English and Swedish, pastoral counselor for adults and couples, Dongzhimenwai. Needs-based sliding scale. Existential therapy, marriage, and family. For more information email mopeandersson@yahoo.com.
Online Resources:
Expat Therapy: Therapy for Expats, Privacy Protected, Fully Licensed – Start With A Free Consultation Now. Wherever You Are, Online Therapy With Your Own Online Therapist From the Comfort of Home. Secure. In 4 Languages. No Waiting List. Affordable. Flexible Details here.
Expat Exchange: Expat counselors and psychotherapists provide services to expats who have adjustment and other personal, professional and familial issues while living abroad. Expat life can be much more rewarding with the help of these trained professionals. Details here.
KEEP READING: Tell Me About Your Day: The Pros and Cons of the “Therapist Friend”
Images: Unsplash
