We all know that one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. The following baby products were weird enough to attract the attention of Ripley’s Believe It or Not and to be used as props for Saturday Night Live. You’ll have to see them to believe them. The following descriptions were sourced from parenting.com.
Baby Bangs
Babies are great and all, but you know what would make them even better? If they weren’t so bald. These delicate hair bands with attached mop tops may have been the basis for the Saturday Night Live ad spoof for baby toupees, but these appear to be 100 percent real. Baby Bangs, available at baby-bangs.com, USD 29.95
Baby String Bikini
Two-piece swimsuits do make for easier diaper changes, but does the bikini have to look like something straight off the beaches of Brazil? Also, reality check: These string ‘kinis, which are available in sizes starting at birth, are too tiny to actually wear with a diaper. Now that’s a pool evacuation waiting to happen. Babi-kini, available at babikini.com, USD 30
Fetus Necklace
This necklace is unnerving to think about let alone look at! The necklace is filled with blood as well as a fetus (hopefully not real). You’ve heard of a conversation starter? This is the ultimate conversation stopper.
“My, what a pretty necklace! What is it?”
“A fetus. In a jar of blood.”
“?”
Temperature Test Duck
No one wants to scald their child with too-hot bath water, but we’re a bit puzzled by this ducky. You have to pick it up and turn it over to check the temp gauge underneath, at which point wouldn’t you have just
felt the water?
Temperature Duck, available at
imprintitems.com. USD 2.95
Play-Doh Cologne
Perfume is supposed to make you feel alluring, not remind you of that time you spent an hour getting Play-Doh out of the carpet. So we don’t really get this limited-edition scent, which says “playtime” more than “sexytime.”
Demeter Play-Doh Cologne Spray For Women, available at
amazon.com, USD 18.99
Bathroom Baby Harness
Ok, we admit, this has happened to us: you’re busting to use the bathroom while wearing your baby, and there’s not a germ-free spot to put him down while you do your business. Solution: this hanging harness. However, you have to remember to cram it into your already crowded diaper bag—and this unique situation will probably occur maybe four times in your life, which comes out to about $10 per pee.
Babykeeper Hanging Harness, available at
mommysentials.com, USD 39.99
Baby Bum Fan
If your babe’s prone to diaper rash, you know it’s a good idea to let his nether regions air out. But you know what works well for that? Plain old air, not the kind pushed out by whirring blades aimed at the family jewels.
Baby Bottom Fan, available at
nithome.co.kr, e-mail for price
Placenta Brooch
Toddler Urinal
Baby Perfume
Babies are born with their own luscious signature scent called Eau de Baby Head. Why would you want to cover it up with something from a bottle?
Kaloo Blue Perfume, available at
minipompom.com, USD 25
Handkerchief Bracelet
We’ve all been there: you notice a little something hanging off your kid’s nose, and you don’t have any tissues on hand. The Snozzie makes sure you always have a handkerchief at the ready, but we can’t get past the fact that for the rest of the day, you’ll be wearing boogers.
Snozzie, available at
snozzie.com, USD 11
Parent and Child Leash
Photo courtesy of Joe Malone (Flickr)
