I awoke with the usual start when I heard my daughter calling out in the night for Baba. Springing from bed as if the building were on fire, I rushed into the living room, only to come to a complete standstill as I tried to comprehend where I was and what I was doing. Despite the soft glow of the streetlight washing in from the open curtain, I felt totally in the dark. The room seemed unfamiliar, as if the walls had been rearranged, my purpose in being there escaped me, and if it were not for the clarion call of my daughter’s voice, I might still be stuck there.
Unfortunately, this kind of thing occurs with greater frequency these days as our twins find new and creative ways to tag-team with their big sister at precise intervals in the night to obliterate anything that constitutes even a restless night’s sleep. Basically, my children are conspiring to end my life through sleep deprivation.
Two nights ago, an unidentified baby (presumably one of our twins) let out some babble, and I sat upright in bed mumbling about the square root of a bottle and should I prepare one bottle or two? Savvy, half-asleep and nursing Ryder didn’t even bother to say anything. In my defense, it made total sense to me at the time.
I mentioned to a doctor friend the other day that I managed to eek out six hours of sleep (my minimum just to be functional) and she wondered why I looked so tired. When I explained that I got two hours in one stretch during the night, two hours in another, and then two more in the afternoon, she explained to me that in terms of sleep 2+2+2 does not equal 6. That’s a shame, because I thought math still made sense to me; clearly I’ve lost my grip on that bit of reality too.
And thus I sit (slouch) with daydreams of sleep. I’m not greedy. I would be content with 4 hours at one go; I won’t even imagine 6 or 8. It is only six weeks into our adventure with twins and being parents of three kids, but it already feels like I have lost a year of sleep and will never get caught up. Yet somehow, I know my wife and I will both make it. I’ve already adapted a remarkable ability to quickly fall asleep at the slightest provocation. Any time I lay my head down, like so, I immediately adsffffaz;;;;;kjdiiojzzzzzzzzzzz
Photo by mcbill via Flickr
