Gearing up for the holiday season can bring a great sense of joy and anticipation for both parents and children. On the other hand, it can cause a great deal of stress and anxiety. As we inch ever closer to that time, it may be helpful to look for ways to manage stress and deal with possible issues before they arise.
Talk with your children about different holiday traditions around the world, the meanings behind them, and the reasons that people choose to celebrate these holidays. Recognize that not everyone views this time in the same way, and help your children appreciate their own and other people’s traditions.
Help set realistic expectations
Rather than allowing your child’s mind to run wild with all the things they hope for and want, help them to learn about making wise choices, spending money responsibly, and finding satisfaction within the simple pleasures of life. Consider giving them a small budget to buy gifts for family members or help them to make meaningful gifts that are homemade.
Make connections with the people who mean the most
At the core of most holiday traditions is the feeling of togetherness that comes from enjoying time with others. Especially when stress and anxiety about holidays creep in, it’s important to step back, find those special people and spend time with them. An unexpected cup of coffee or chat can be simple to arrange and go a long way in terms of reducing holiday anxiety.
For those who are anxious about family dynamics that often come up during holiday celebrations, it might be helpful to imagine the worst-case scenario. If we can imagine it, we can plan for it. Take as many other stressors away as possible. Recognize and accept family members and others as they are. Know that you can only be responsible for your own actions. Plan for how to manage that one situation you hope won’t come up. Hopefully, it will be much easier to deal with if and when it does. Regardless of how anyone else responds to a stressful situation, you can do what you must to take care of yourself and model to your children emotional regulation and health.
Make realistic travel plans
Many parents may feel pushed to go over the top with their holiday plans and then struggle with how to manage the cost and the stress of travel later on. Sometimes the easiest route is the best. The magic of the holidays can spring out of any location, and sometimes the path of least resistance leads to the most relaxed and enjoyable holiday.
Children today have more material wealth in general than at any other time. While it’s wonderful and exciting to have new things, it may be even more valuable to have the memories of time well-spent together. Rather than overtaxing family budgets on all the new gadgets, consider paring down. Give gifts that are going to be well–loved over time and are particularly special. Take some time to plan activities (and not too many!) that will carry on for many years. Consider building a family gingerbread house, making homemade tree decorations, or doing some special holiday baking and cooking. Make gifts for family and friends. Make a collection of holiday songs to sing and plan to go caroling at the homes of friends and loved ones. There are many activities that are free or low cost, which do a great deal to spread cheer and holiday joy. These are often the activities that people remember years later and perhaps even carry on.
This article appeared in the beijingkids December 2019 Giving Back issue
