I did a crazy thing over the weekend. I signed my family up for a six-mile hike out in the wilderness of Huairou District following the White River between the Yunmeng Mountains.
My family has never walked around in any Beijing park for longer than a couple hours, and certainly not farther than a total distance of maybe two miles. The last time I asked my 6-year-old to walk the dog with me, he gave up before we had even left my residential compound. As for my husband, he loves the idea of hiking…in theory. On the bus back into the city post-hike, when I asked him if he would do it again, he replied, “I enjoyed it, but I might have enjoyed it just as much if I was lying in bed dreaming about hiking.”
Ever since we arrived in Beijing two years ago, I had set my mind on joining at least one Beijing Hikers’ hike, and had signed up several times before, but had always backed out due to complaints of “the air looks bad” or “I’m still stuffed from eating too much last night.” But nobody was getting out of it this time!
So on Saturday morning, despite the gray skies I woke up to at 6am, I wasn’t backing down. If the hikers had determined the weather to be safe for hiking, then by Merlin’s beard I was going! My resolve did waver a little as our tour bus drove right into heavy rain as we passed through Shunyi and my husband turned to me and said, “Perfect hiking weather.” Luckily, the rain tapered off as we entered the mountains, but the hikers handed out ponchos anyway.
One of the reasons that my family had been hesitant to go on such hikes was the driving time. My husband’s rationale is that it’s completely ridiculous to spend more time driving to your destination than actually being at your destination. I was grateful that the two-hour drive was exactly as the hikers had estimated, with a well-placed toilet break in the middle. Another small victory: My visit to the public toilet at the start of the hike didn’t make me dry-heave as most public toilets here usually do.
Lesson One: Know Your Destination
Before we set off on the hike, the guides showed us a map and briefed us on the route. This really helped to prepare us mentally, and gave us something to look forward to when we got tired. For this hike in particular, my husband had spotted a little area labelled “beach” on the map and made a note of asking our kid to keep an eye out for it because our son loves to play with sand.
Lesson Two: Have a Variety of Snacks on Standby (Especially a Sweet Drink)
For the hike we had packed ham and cheese sandwiches, chocolate biscuits, crackers, chips, gummy worms, coconut water, and regular water. My kid sampled and consumed 80% of each item. When one thing stopped providing motivation for him to put one foot in front of the other, we would have to resort to another treat to keep him moving. The coconut water was especially delicious while hiking on a warm summer day, if I do say so myself!
Lesson Three: Have a Backup Plan
When my son had his first meltdown and burst into tears, I was at a loss. He is way too big for us to carry, there were no roads for a vehicle to pick us up, and most of all, I didn’t want to turn back! The guide, my husband, and I all tried cajoling him, but his tears wouldn’t stop until a ham and cheese sandwich was offered. That was when we learned to dangle the carrot (almost literally) to lure him ahead. If your child is small enough, a child carrier backpack might be a good backup option. Otherwise, make sure you have some tricks up your sleeve like the ones in the next lesson!
Lesson Four: Be Ready To Go Slow and Do Some Handholding
After the first meltdown, my son continued to have mini meltdowns throughout the hike. The guide cleverly asked him to look out for the red ribbons that the Beijing Hikers use to mark the trail, and allowed him to collect them for her. This tactic definitely helped keep him moving. We stumbled upon another strategy when he asked to hold my hand at one point. Inwardly I grimaced and groaned at the thought of moving at a snail’s pace, but I soon discovered that as long as I held his hand, he kept trudging on without a word of complaint. It was slow moving for sure, but it actually turned out to be a beautiful thing.
Lesson Five: Kids Are Better at Climbing Than Walking
For the first five miles of the hike we were walking on mostly level terrain out in the open along the river. However, the last mile was almost completely vertical. While the kid had been in tears and moving like sludge for most of the walking part, he transformed into a mountain goat when it came to the vertical climb. He actually led the group alongside the leader, leaving me and my husband in the dust! I couldn’t even see him through the trees, and could only hear his voice carried by the wind. We theorized that a) it was way more interesting to most kids to use their limbs to climb terrain and b) that their little bodies are way lighter and more suited to scrambling uphill than our old, tired bodies. I have verified this with several other parents and found it to be true for plenty of kids, so take this into consideration when choosing a hike in the future.
I am immensely proud that my child pushed himself all the way to finish the hike, and am also quite proud that the adults, including myself, were patient and giving enough to let him help himself. This is how he may hopefully develop true grit.
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Images: Vivienne Tseng-Rush
