Our expat community thrives on connection, and here at Jingkids, we’re all about our readers, what they need and want in order to maximize their time here in Beijing. Every Monday, we’re going to feature a prominent member of our expat community and get to know them a little bit better.
I am a so called “nomad” by choice. I’ve lived more than 15 years in between boxes and suitcases, constantly packing and unpacking, building up and putting down, trying to push my resources to the limits, constantly adapting and reinventing myself many times in different places and situations, questioning traditional values, and social patterns.
I left my home country of Romania long ago and I’ve adopted this life following my husband in his diplomatic career. I have turned personal career ambitions into a new experience and found myself following the new adventures life brings in this journey of discovering and constantly learning more about the world and myself.
Because of my background (I have studied Psychology and have a Master’s Degree in Music Therapy), I am passionate about human connections and because I was always living in a multicultural environment, I learned to focus more on what make us alike but not different.
What’s on your mind?
I really like the quote of Jules Renard: “Getting bored of your own life is a very ugly form of disrespect for yourself.”
Keeping this in mind, I do a lot of things which make me happy and keep me excited about life. Things such as volunteering, organizing events, workshops, activities for children… my favorite thing is to bring people together. You feel like a magician, creating opportunities for them to come together, when all their synergies synchronize, magic is happening, and wonderful connections are formed.
I worked on many projects, but my favorite one was “The Summer of 2020.” A summer program dedicated to the Diplomatic Children, who were stuck in Beijing because of the pandemic. The program was specifically designed to try and shift a very unhappy, stressful, and depressing experience into a wonderful journey of discovery and joy. Together with my very good Bulgarian friend and keeping in mind that “it takes a village to raise a child”
we managed to find love and passion in a hopeless time. We put things together and organized a widely diverse and complex program for children: sport, art, music, dancing, and many more others.
I never stop making plans and putting things together for future projects. I’ve also been a volunteer at the Beijing International Society since I arrived here in 2017 and I very much enjoy our work and our community.
What’s your motivation to get moving?
I always had to juggle between “making the best of what we have” and the frustration of what we can’t have. Raising children and living life, trying to find a balance between making the most out of every chance life offers us and what we can give in return. This applies to everyone like us, but when you have to raise a Third Culture Kid who is also special needs, everything becomes more challenging. I was constantly forced to think outside the box when trying to find solutions because of her being different and not fitting into many frames… I had to break walls, when there wasn’t any other way out, to build up when there was nothing to lay on; but despite all these, I am very grateful for my daughter because all these battles helped make so much of who I am today. Trying to explain that there is nothing bad in being different and trying to navigate through all the challenges and sorrows deeply changed me into a better person. And also having her, the way she is brought only wonderful friends in our lives that we are so grateful for. We are also very grateful for the technology we have which make possible the long-distance communication with my eldest daughter who studies in Europe and who we haven’t seen for over two years. Sounds surreal, but is true.
I’m grateful for finally finding a school for my daughter where she feels happy, accepted, and worthy. (Auesome Place).
How do you stay sane in all the madness?
All the experiences that I had, especially in the last two years made me believe that we need to change the paradigm “who has information has the power” into “who knows how to manage their emotions will win the battle with the big changes that are coming.”
I spend a lot of time with myself trying to learn how to navigate through the flow of emotions and how to make good decisions. Emotions are the most powerful vector of communication and also the vehicle that take us to different destinations. Imagine yourself on a platform in a railway station with so many trains; so many options… Which one should I take? Shall I choose “Anger”? It might take me to the desert… Shall I take “Sadness”… or “Happiness”? I know it’s difficult, but I learned that you have to take time to decide what emotion you choose to follow as any mistake or error might take you to a place you don’t want to be.
I really like this poem, commonly referred to as “The Guest House” by Rumi, which I find it so appropriate to describe the time we are living in:
“This being human is a guest house.
Every morning a new arrival.
A joy, a depression, a meanness,
some momentary awareness comes
as an unexpected visitor.
Welcome and entertain them all!
Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,
who violently sweep your house
empty of its furniture,
still, treat each guest honorably.
He may be clearing you out
for some new delight.
The dark thought, the shame, the malice,
meet them at the door laughing,
and invite them in.
Be grateful for whoever comes,
because each has been sent
as a guide from beyond”
So I am trying to work on my attitude towards life… (I failed so many times, but I keep trying) I am trying to learn and practice Happiness, I practice Yoga, Taiji, Meditation, Reiki and I also love playing Mahjong with my friends.
I am listening to music and trying my best to stay connected with my eldest daughter whom I miss so badly.
What’s your favorite thing about Beijing?
Apart from the online shopping? I like the flow and the speed of the city, I like that it’s so big and dense that you can never really reach its ending or fully know it. It’s a place that never sleeps, it never stops transforming and moving forward. I really like springtime in Beijing; the flowers in the streets and all over the bushes during the winter. I like biking and I like that with little effort, anyone could find their people, who you can share the same passions or interests with.
Have someone you believe deserves some recognition for their outstanding contributions to our community? Nominate them for our weekly spotlight by writing their name in the comments below!
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Images: Courtesy of Corina Diana Constantinescu
